1) Chop off all inedible bits
2) Cut up
3) Put into covered microwave bowl with splash of water
4) Nuke for 4 minutes
5) Remember they are in there and don’t leave them for a week
A nice correspondent has written in to say that plastic takeaway containers make splendid microwave bowls. Just leave the lid loose.
If you use a ceramic bowl you will need longer than 4 minutes because the material absorbs heat.